Soil amended and seeds sown. Check. Crops harvested, canned, pickled, and preserved. Check. Grain silo erected and surpluses stockpiled. Check. Chicken coops built. Check. Livestock and beasts of burden bred and reared. Check. Rain barrels connected to water filtration and purification system. Check. Solar panels attached to roof, tax credit claimed. Check. Underground bunker built. Check. Antibiotics acquired through extralegal means and placed in lock box. Check. Small arsenal of automatic and semi-automatic weapons acquired through legal means and strewn about fully loaded. Check. Shortwave radio assembled from DIY kit. Check. Moat dug and filled with spikes. Check.
Bert had done all he could on his little urban plot to prepare for the impending collapse of advanced industrial civilization. It was time to do as the Lord had done 6,000 years ago after toiling away on Creation for 6 days straight. It was time to take a 7 (and drink some home-brewed mead).
Can I stay with Bert when the zombie apocalypse descends? Unless, of course, he's nothing but a paper Big Bird.
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